Get all 8 Psychostick releases available on Bandcamp and save 20%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of ... and stuff, Do, IV: Revenge of the Vengeance, Space Vampires VS Zombie Dinosaurs in 3-D, The Digital Appetizer, Sandwich, The Flesh Eating Rollerskate Holiday Joyride, and We Couldn't Think of a Title.
1. |
We Are a Band
01:48
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We are a band that DO music
Our name is Psychostick
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2. |
You Can (Maybe) Do It
04:20
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You wanna be like me? You wanna soften up?
Well it ain't easy so you better step your game down, son
Whatcha think you know about fuckin' up
Take a seat and let me show you how it's not done
I can talk the talk, and avoid the walk
I can make the same choices and rely on luck
Got excuses for days that I'll defend
Gonna ride the C- till the bitter end.
I scare off all my friends
I forget to take my vitamins
Life can throw anything at me
I will always react the same
Get emotional and hang my head in shame.
When I get knocked down I get upset about it
When I get upset I do nothing about it
When I get put down I get obsessed about it
I ignore advice from everyone
Don't need self esteem, when your pride's enough
Cuz I suck
Got ya beat at how much I suck
I'm the WORST.
You think you're just like me? You think you're born to fail?
You don't know the lost cause of this hollow shell
I'm broken as fuck, I'm damaged goods
The burned out Little Engine that Never Could
I'm a caged tiger that sits and waits
For someone to kindly open the gate
I'm the guitar that gently weeps
I'm a door mat so wipe your feet on me
I can't admit I'm wrong
I forget to call my mom
Life can throw anything at me
I will always react the same
Whine online and find someone else to blame
When I get knocked down I get upset about it
When I get setback I do jack shit about it
When I get knocked down I get depressed about it
Gonna shut the door and wish that I could die
I could off myself but I'm too lazy to to try
Cuz I suck
I'm pathetic and I also suck
Smashing boundaries on how to suck
Got Self-diagnosed OCD manic bipolar personality with
ADD borderline hyperactive mood swings
Impulse control-lacking, antisocial
Histrionic narcissistic all-avoidant codependent
A.D.D.... hold on, I think I already said that
Self-loathing people hating
Way too much masturbating
Overthinking, overeating
Oversleep and drool
Cynical, critical
Randomly hysterical
Miserable
My voicemail is always full
Scatterbrained, paranoid
Chronically unemployed
Scared of phone calls
and I hate ordering pizza.
Way too self-righteous
Failing every drug test
Issues with trust
And I sneeze when I'm nervous
When you ask me if I'm okay,
I will dodge it relentlessly
I'll say I'm fine and I don't need therapy
When I get knocked down I get upset about it
When I get upset, I lay down and wallow in it
When I get walled in, I get cryptic about it
I'll keep doing the same things everyday
Cuz if I do, I bet things will change
Cuz I suck
I bet tomorrow that I'll still suck
My endlessly complex set of issues gives me a sense of identity
Thus I suck
No one sucks as much as I suck.
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3. |
Tuesday
02:05
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You know what day it is.
It’s undeniably, indisputably, unquestionably, indubitably, undebatably, incontestably, unequivocally, irrefutably, unmistakeably
Tuesday.
Tell me what’s the day that comes after Monday? Tuesday.
Tell me what’s the day that comes before Wednesday? Tuesday.
Tell me what’s the day that’s furthest from Saturday? Tuesday.
What’s the day that comes once a week?
It’s Tuesday, my favorite day of the week.
No obligations that affect me significantly
Let's hear it for Tuesday!
Tuesday, Tuesday, I like Tuesday
I like today which is Tuesday
TUESDAY!
Whatcha got going on on Tuesday?
What’s going on on Tuesday?
It's Tuesday, my favorite day of the week.
Nothing exciting but aggressive monotony.
Let's hear it for Tuesday the most average day of the week!
Maybe I'll take a nap while I'm doing a load of laundry
Tuesday, Tuesday, I like Tuesday
Do you like Tuesday too... zday?
Tuesday, Tuesday, we like Tuesday
This song is about Tuesday!
Get it?
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4. |
Adulting
03:50
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I don't wanna adult today
Things to fix, bills to pay
I just want to stay in bed
Play video games, but instead
I gotta get up, go to work
Put on pants, iron my shirt
Warm up my car, did I get gas?
Sit in traffic, this jerk won't let me pass
I've had enough adulting, no more being grown up for me
Let the bills pile up to the ceiling (in PJs)
playing Super Mario 3
NO.
I can't do that, I gotta DOOO the thing
But I don't wanna do the thing!
But you gotta do the thing!
I'm not gonna do the thing!
Adulting is suffering and suffering is not for me
Adulting has got to be the purest form of misery
I don't wanna do stuff. Doing stuff is stupid
A meaningless existence: Doing stuff to live to have to do more stuff
You must renew your license plate, utilities need to be paid. STOP.
I need a break from the stress, taxes overdue, car needs an emissions test
I can't take it anymore! Filthy bathroom floor, and I gotta go to the store
Going to the store is such a bore.
Paying bills has no thrills.
Putting on pants is a torturous dance
Being an adult is the worst kind of cult.
I'm done with adulting, no more being grown up for me
I'm gonna call off work, third day in a row, eating chicken strips, playing Battletoads
I'm done with adulting, no more responsibility
I'm out of food and money, but I gotta finish season 3
And they fired me. I gotta find a job.
I don't wanna get a job! But you gotta get a job!
I don't want another job! Spruce up your resume!
I hate job hunting! Shave your beard! NO!
Adulting is suffering and suffering is not for me
Adulting has got to be the purest form of misery
I don't wanna job hunt. Job hunting is stupid
A meaningless existence: Work a job to live to have to work a job
I refuse to get a job, or do adulting stuff I'd rather
Erect a couch cushion fortress.
Have a staring contest with my cat, Sergeant Snuggles
Rewatch all 121 episodes of Lost (still don't get it)
Fall asleep with the lights on
Eat Ramen straight out of the pack
Let the dishes attract fruit flies
Make a Youtube page for Sergeant Snuggles
I've had it. Don't you dare judge me. Been told since birth, to follow my dreams
You're looking at it. I'm living the dream, the lifetime pursuit of ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.
The pursuit of nothing.
I don't wanna human today, no more brushing teeth, let them decay
Haven't showered in over a week, I don't even wanna think.
Just leave me here in bed. Pull the covers over my head.
Let the world think I'm dead cuz I'm gonna...
I'm finished with adulting, no more being grown up for me.
Sergeant Snuggles' Youtube page has a billion views, so I'm getting paid.
Give up on adulting, you just gotta follow your dreams.
Don't need a job or any skills when your kitty cat can pay the bills.
Sergeant Snuggles
Passive income
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5. |
From the Heart
03:16
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I fucking hate you, you're the worst
Everything you do is really annoying
If you were drowning, I would smile
I don't like you on a personal level
I fucking hate you, you're the worst
I fucking hate you
And if you died I know I'd cry
tears of joy from deep inside
You'll waste while we celebrate
It may seem harsh, but you're a dick
Eat shit.
Fucking hate you
You're a douchebag
I hope every time you're barefoot you step on a LEGO
Hope every puzzle you make is missing one piece
I hope you develop an allergy to sex
I hope your children can't learn to read
Fucking hate you
You're an asshole
I wish you'd die, see your family cry
Collect their tears in a vial, mix them in a cocktail
Dancing on your grave, popping the champagne
This one's for you, you piece of shit
Douche-canoe, you flying fucking discharge o-ring prick
I fucking hate you
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6. |
Do
01:22
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Do do do do do do do
Do do do do do do do do
do do do do do do do
Do do do do do do do do
Hey man, what time is it?
It's a quarter half-past Do
Aw shit! I'm fifteen minutes late for
Do pew pa do!
Do do do do do do do do do
do do do do do do digada digida do
Do do do do do do do do do
and that's how you do!
When it's time to do
I know what to do, I just
Do do do do do do do do
What's wrong with you, not down with the do?
Well I got somethin' for you, it goes a little like this:
Do do do do do do do
Do do do do do do do do
do do do do do do do
Do do do do do do do do
Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do
Do do do do do do do do do do do digida digiga do
Do... do do do do doddo adofa dodofa sfioj240fnq24nfq498qjk4bf
Do.
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7. |
got_no_brakes_demo
01:54
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8. |
Introvert Party Time
03:33
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There ain't no party like an introvert party cuz an introvert party don't start.
Fridge is stocked with snacks and food
Music playlist sets the mood
Got a cooler full of booze
Friday night, this weekend's mine
It's finally time to let loose.
It's introvert party time
Staying home and being lame
Gonna read book or play a video game
Dodging social obligations
Annoyed by conversations
Disrupted by extroverts
This one way conversation burns
Assaulted by extroverts
You bring the yap, I bring the hurt
I'm hunted down by "people people"
Before the call, my night was peaceful
A "bad connection," the call was dropped
'Cuz you bring the talk
At the store waiting in line
Cheap tequila, salt and lime
Texted by my friends all day
I'm giving in, I'm going out
Being social in my own way
It's introvert party time
At a barbecue playing on my phone
Sneaking out the backdoor alone
Let's get together some other day
Gonna go back home, and that's where I'll...
Surrounded by extroverts
Small talk stalkers on high alert
Assaulted by extroverts
You bring the yap, I bring the hurt
Flanked left and right by "people people"
Before the swarm my night was peaceful
I spot the exit, it's time to walk
Cuz' you bring the talk
Leave me alone, leave me alone
I don't wanna talk to you
I just wanna be at home
Shouldn't have come out tonight
Wish I could block in real life.
Introvert panic time
My worst fears are coming true
Boy, you gonna take a shot out of that shoe!
Panic attack anxiety
Surrounded by extroverts
They wanna fight, it's red alert
Assaulted by extroverts
Ow! Ow! These punches hurt
Flanked left and right by angry people
Before the brawl my night was peaceful
Knew this would happen, I had a hunch
Now they bring the punch
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9. |
Thinkin' With Yer Dick
01:49
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Do you have the balls
You were thinkin' with your dick. Thinkin' with your dick.
Thinkin thinkin thinkin thinkin thinkin with your dick.
Thinkin with your weiner. Thinkin with your schlong
Thinkin with your rinky dinky diddley dinky dong
You got a broken heart cuz you were thinkin' with your dick
You're broke out of cash from spending money with your dick
You got a broken nose she had a boyfriend who has a dick
Now you're home alone with porn, your right hand, and your dick
Thinkin with your sausage. Thinkin with your stick
Thinkin with your teeny weenie dinky winkie wick
Thinkin with your twinkie. Thinkin with your twig
Thinkin thinkin thinkin always thinkin with your dick.
Do you have the balls to not listen to your penis.
Then you didn't wear protection you were thinkin' with your dick
Now it burns whenever you are peeing with your dick
She's knocking on your door with news that's gonna make you sick
Looks like you knocked her up cuz you were thinkin' with your dick
Thinkin' with your pecker, thinking with your prick
Congrats you are a father you were thinkin' with your dick
Thinkin' with your willy, thinkin' with your wang
Now you gotta rethink your life but have to use your brain.
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10. |
Uncle Material
03:41
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Oh, no! Babies everywhere
Everybody's having babies!
Crying and pissing and burping and spittin' and fussin' and shittin' while making you rue the day
Babies. Too many babies.
Listen up everyone, here's the scoop
Babies like to turn your money into poop.
Newborns all look like aliens
They spawn on this planet and abduct your best friend
Sleep deprived, want to die, as I rock him to sleep
Work all day, rinse, lather, then repeat
Sing a lullaby while ignoring the smell
Gotta keep the thing alive or you'll end up in jail
Babies will whine and cry
All day and night
What I'm trying to say is
I don't wanna have baby
That's a "no," not a "maybe"
Everybody says I'm crazy
Cuz I don't wanna raise a baby.
I may end up really lonely
But at least I'm not a daddy
I don't wanna clean up vomit
Or wipe off a poopy heiny.
Oh, YEAH! I can get a vasectomy!
Denying parents grandbabies
Sisters and brothers and fathers and mothers and aunties and uncles all push me to reproduce
Chew toys do not pacify
Listen up, everyone, here's the deal
You're not the one that's gonna end up paying the bills
Parenthood's a prison of barf and tears
A mandatory minimum of 18 years
Overpopulation is rising too
So let's add another mouth to compete for food
Take a good look at me, tell me now
Do we really need another me running around?
Babies will break the bank
and crush your dreams
What I'm trying to say is
I don't wanna have a baby
That's a "no", not a "maybe"
Pay someone to sterilize me
That will ensure I have no baby
I think I'd rather have rabies
Than to rear a human baby
All the money I'd be saving
Could buy a robot or a puppy
So much poop
Too much pee
No free time
No more sleep
Kill me
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11. |
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Bacon, egg, and cheese on toast with Sriracha
Bacon, egg, and cheese on toast with Sriracha-racha
Bacon! Two eggs! Motherfuckin' pepper-jack!
On toast! Whole wheat!
Breakfast!
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12. |
Uhhhnngg
00:53
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???
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13. |
Stream Stutter
04:17
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How could you?
I stepped into the room to see
The truth of you betraying me
A guilty look upon your face
Lit up by the glow of your laptop screen
How could you watch our show without me? Was I not worth waiting for?
How can I get caught up to where you are with a whole season or more?
How can we talk about our theories when I'm so behind?
Now a sea of episodes between us has me lost inside
Stream stutter
Our bond is buffering and the show can't go on
Stream stutter
Another broken stream a connection lost
You say you'll watch it all again
Lie to myself, as I pretend
You glance excitedly at me
Before every pivotal scene
No I didn't know that character died, but I guess I know it now
You claim you didn't realize you got mixed up somehow
I wish that you could see what your thoughtless binging did to me
And you - you think it's all okay although you spoiled everything
Stream stutter
Connection throttling, and the show can't go on
Stream stutter
Another frozen screen from a wicked heart
I'd wait for you but maybe I
Should watch it by myself tonight
I'll see the last ones all alone
Till 6am on my phone
I'll give you 13 Reasons Why
You're Breaking my heart Bad
You Parked and Rec'd my soul
Now I join the Walking Deadwood
My trust is a House of Cards
My Orange is the New Black Mirror
A Game of Boardwalk Empires
gives Stranger Thrones than, uhhhh... Westworld
Give me your username and password!
Thanks!
Stream stutter buffering - how could you do this to me?
Stream stutter throttling - how could you do this to me?
Stream stutter
Our bond is
Stream stutter
Our time is
Consider our binging cancelled
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14. |
got_no_brakes_mix_ver3
01:39
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15. |
Socks & Sandals
03:19
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I'm here at the grocery store
In the frozen food aisle, honeys cracking a smile
Done up in pajama pants
Sandals and socks left the house without giving it a second thought
Dignity bailed out
Long ago, but I'm feeling comfortable
Hobbling around in your tight slacks, wishin' you could be this relaxed
I'm talking about up in the morning, don't wanna get dressed
Least amount of effort, forget all the rest
Why yes, these are Yoshi pajama pants
Thank you for noticing. They're the best.
People say I look lazy
Can't they see that does not faze me?
Judging yet they don't know
I am going commando
Socks and sandals and pj pants (comfortable)
Socks, sandals, pajama pants (relaxing)
Socks and sandals and pj pants
Socks, sandals, pajama pants
I look AWESOME.
In my socks and sandals, socks and sandals
Socks, sandals, and pajama pants
I got my socks and sandals, tell me can you handle?
Wait. Let me adjust
I'm freeballin' so sometimes it's a must
That guy has no self-respect. Laundry neglect?
Naw, I'm legit.
Wish you had the balls to live this lifestyle
Cuz after a while you'd stick to it.
Go with the flow
Takin' it slow
Let yourself go
Cuz we both know
I'm not taking the fast lane
If it's all the same, I'll remain on the comfort train
All aboard!
Got your ticket?
Cross this line, it's a one-way trip
Wave goodbye to giving a shit
I'm living this life like it's meant to be lived
People say that I look lazy
Can't they see that does not faze me?
Envious, they all stare
I'm not wearing underwear!
Socks and sandals and pj pants. No restriction
Socks, sandals, pajama pants. Zero friction
Socks and sandals and pj pants. That must feel awesome
Socks, sandals, pajama pants
This feels AWESOME.
When I'm in my
Socks and sandals, socks and sandals
Socks, sandals, and pajama pants
I got my socks and sandals, tell me can you handle
I got them socks. He's got them socks
I got them sandals. Open toe!
Go to the store in socks, sandals, and pajama pants
I got my socks. You got them what?
I got flip flops. He's the MAN
I'm pumping gas in socks, sandals, and pajama pants
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16. |
Keys
01:17
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Where did I put my keys? Oh no,
I really need to leave I'm late.
They should be right here but they're not.
I've looked everywhere but they are gone.
OH! There they are, silly me! That's right.
They were in the pants I wore last night.
I should not overreact like that.
Now where did I put my wallet at?
Ah, there it is.
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17. |
Gurrrrrr
00:31
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???
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18. |
Moving Day
06:10
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Move his stuff.
Staring at the wall, what have I committed to?
A sacred social pact, something you cannot undo
Friendship maintenance and guilt forms a moving crew
If I do not help you move then you won't help me move
You told us all to be here right at noon yet you are still packing and
Guilty of betrayal #1: We're working but you have been slacking
Up and down and up and down and up and down the stairs again
You hoard all your useless crap you refuse to donate to Goodwill and
I sacrifice my weekend to wading through your forsaken loot and
We repeatedly ask "What is this? Where's this go? What do you do with this?"
I now descend down the stairs prone all alone in the spider basement
Up and down and up and down I wish that you were not my friend
What is all this pointless shit you kept
Ugly lobster tongs from your Uncle Jeff
Curse your box that's overstuffed with textbooks you forgot exist
It's moving day! Nothing says "Thanks, buddy"
Like a $5 Little Caesar's Hot and Ready
It's moving day! Nothing gives life meaning
Like doing heavy lifting all day and sneezing
It's moving day! Nothing says commitment
Like the friend with the truck that couldn't make it
It's moving day! I just love getting splinters
Then whacking my shins before smashing my fingers
Move his stuff! There's more stuff! So much stuff!
Flinch from that dog that barks every freakin' time you pass by it
We disagree please tell me how do you move a goddamn plant
Drip on my head now it rains and I'm wet, the boxes are ripping and
Spilling all your cables kneeling down, on the ground now my shoes are all squishy
DVI and VGA, S-Video and RCA
USB 1, 2, and 3, mini, micro, A and B
40-pin IDE, a wired mouse from ‘93
Broken parts you can’t replace, ya better keep ‘em just in case
Guilty of betrayal #2: All the restaurants closed and it's too late for food
You disappeared 2 hours ago come back and now you smell like reefer
Dude, I'm about to beat you to death with this vacuum cleaner
It's moving day! So glad it's raining
I'm hauling your junk as you stand there complaining
It's moving day! Well, this is a treat!
The sun's gone down and there's nothing to eat!
It's moving day! Betrayal #3
You exaggeratted how quick this would be
It's moving day! Havin' so much fun!
It's 1:00 am and we're still not done
Movin a couch.
We're moving a couch
Break out the chainsaw, gonna cut it in half!
One love seat's now 2 recliners
I'll set all your stuff on fire
Burn it to the ground, burn to the ground
furniture, watch it burn, old apartment, new apartment too
Burn it to the ground
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19. |
Rent in Peace
05:01
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Friday night 1994
Me and my friends are stepping through that door
To see movies, VHS and DVD
On shelves as far as the eye could see
Flicks I seek and I would always find
Joy in the aisles whatever I desired
SNES and NES and Sega Genesis
Unless some jerk beat me to the one I wanted should've come a little sooner but I digress
One by one I watched them close
Or turn into a "Cash for Gold"
The movie palace that gave us hope gives out payday loans
And this kids will never know
Blockbuster Video
Every weekend we would go
Then we'd bring the movies home
Netflix ain't got nothing tonight
and Redbox leaves me dead inside
My childhood video rental spot is now a parking lot
And the kids will never know.
Sunday night, it's time to take 'em back
It's 11:47, better get to haulin' ass
I'm running red lights
Ignoring stop signs
Cuz last time I didn't pay the late fee a collection agency was coming after me
Barely made it! Whew!
Little did I know
I was rushing to return my final video
What can we resort to now?
To pretend that we're going out?
A sacred ritual lost to time and we can't rewind
And the kids will never know
Hollywood Video
Every weekend I would go and bring my treasures home
On-demand can lick my balls
And torrenting takes way too long
There's only one place that I wanna be, but it's up for lease
And the kids will never know.
All of those games
Wow, what a different time we're living in
And the kids'll never know
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20. |
||||
21. |
||||
Hah.
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22. |
Flop
04:02
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Flop Flop
Let me teach you how to flop
Gonna teach you how to flop
First you put your hands on the ground
Then you put your face on the ground
Then you put your whole body on the ground
And now that you’re down on the ground it’s time to flop
Floppin’ all over the floor.
You know you flop good when you look like a trout
Trying to get air but you can’t, 'cuz you’re a trout
On the dance floor. That’s the way to flop
Hey watch me flop, ladies love my moves like *ahh*
Hey, let’s all drop
To the floor and flop flop flop flop
Don’t you know the flop? It’s the hottest dance around man
When I hear that beat you know I gotta drop then
Shake my body like fish up on the dock man
This the flop can, you do the flop can
You convulse yourself looking like a salmon
Swimming up river to the mating beds
You gotta flop
Like a fishy fishy flop
Come on everybody flop
Get down on the ground face down and
Flop flop around flop to the sound
Like a trout
I want to teach you how to flop
I want to school you how to flop
I want you to get down to the floor
Get down, get down, and do the flop
Oooo you flop so good, Oooo you flop so cool
Floppin like a trout, it’s time to flop
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Psychostick Chicago, Illinois
Psychostick is a comedy metal band who enjoys beer, boobs, and the occasional dichotomy of a bi-partisan government. Wait... what?
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